Silence is golden...

It is said we process anywhere between 60,000 to 70,000 thoughts a day. Many of these thoughts are on a feedback loop and are recurring thoughts.

The incessant chatter and the monkey mind which exists between our ears is the main cause of suffering these days. The reason being is that many people believe that because the thoughts are taking place in their mind, they must be real and therefore engage with the thought rather than observe it.

The observer effect states you are not your thoughts, rather you are the witness of the thought process occurring within your mind.

So if many people accept and engage with their thought process, what happens to the heart?

Now you might think the heart does not have a voice of its own. You might be interested to know that the heart has a frequency which is fifty thousand times greater than your brain’s frequency. Research has shown that the heart responds to the outside world well before the brain has time to respond.

What this means, is that we are only using one aspect of the human physiology to interact with our external world. Many people process their external life with their mind by attempting to draw meaning or attach a story, which in many instances is based on past conditioning and perception.

The heart does not have the same bias as the mind and therefore operates independently, whilst also working concurrently with the brain by sending its subtle messages.

Your heart is subtle. It is for this reason that many people find it challenging to become of their FEELINGS rather than their THOUGHTS.

Further to this, given our lives’ have become hectic and chaotic, there is more noise in our external world which means retreating in silence has become increasingly difficult.

If you contemplate that your mind is active for at least twelve hours or more on any given day, it makes sense that learning to quiet the mind takes time and patience.

Whilst I agree that meditation brings with it many lasting benefits, both mental, emotional and physiological, it is still impractical for busy people to find thirty minutes or more each day to sit in silence.

As a teacher of over 20+ years of mindfulness and meditation, I suggest that thirty minutes is the minimum time required to bring the mind into silence. A good practice may be twice a day, once in the morning and last thing in the evening in order to gain greater understanding and awareness of the benefits of meditation.

Being alone in silence allows the mind and body to harmonise with one another. It decelerates the stress response taking place in our body and moves us from a sympathetic state to a parasympathetic state.

Your body cannot thrive in a stressed state since in doing so it gets locked into a sympathetic state — otherwise known as the fight or flight response. The physiological effects on your mind and body may be felt for prolonged periods of this repeated stress cycle. It is important that you seek time out of your busy life and reconnect with your inner self.

One of the ways in which you can approach this is to retreat into silence for as little as ten minutes at a time, spread throughout the day. I would advise that you get outside in nature if possible.

During your working day, a simple ten minute break to go outside and walk around the block can do wonders for your mind and body. If this is not an option, perhaps retreating to a quiet room and sitting alone in silence without the distraction of technological devices would do well to allow you to feel at peace with yourself.

Whether you are a stay-at-home mother or working, there appears to be very little time throughout one’s day to be alone in silence.

Many of you are probably undertaking some form of health fitness regime that might include cardiovascular exercise, resistance training or some form of yoga or Pilates. The point is that you have learned to condition and train your physical body by undertaking this form of exercise.

Conditioning and taming your mind is no different than training your physical body. In many cases it requires consistent persistence and discipline in order to reap the benefits.

One of the easily recognized benefits of going into regular silence is an inner peace and harmony which opposes the chaos of your external world. This means that even though the chaos continues, such as emails, phone calls, deadlines and family pressures, you will find that these external occurrences have less impact on your inner world. What previously set you off and caused frustration and anxiety, will now have little impact on you.

Far too many people use mobiles or ipads to drown out the silence during their walk. Observe the number of people with a device plugged into their ears listening to loud music to drown out what is essentially silence.

I suggest you to take this time to put away your mobile or ipad and just be with yourself.

Ask yourself a simple question of: How am I doing? or an even better one How am I feeling?

Use this time to reconnect with yourself, through your inner world and become aware of the inner landscape and what it is asking of you. Doing so on a consistent basis means that you become aware of your emotional constitution and that you also notice and attend to any untoward thoughts or toxic emotions which may begin to surface.

As you become more comfortable sitting in silence, you will develop a language with your heart. Given that our minds are forever processing repeated thoughts from the previous day, it makes sense to connect with your heart to feel the energy stirring within. At first you might find this process daunting, since many people report that they are unable to hear anything.

When connecting with your heart you will develop a unique awareness which is unlike the language you have been accustomed to all these years. The heart speaks to you in a soft, kind and gentle voice. It gives you a reassuring feeling that you are on the right path or taking the right course of action, because you FEEL it.

I notice a radiating and tingling sensation in my chest area which begins to rise through the back of my neck and into my head. I feel my heart speak to me at times through the simplest aspects of life such as the beautiful colours of the forest as I drive through it or the way my child smiles or giggles. This is your heart talking to you.

A useful exercise to undertake is simply becoming aware and noting in your external environment, what causes your heart to stir with the emotion.

Is it a piece of music that no matter many times you listen to it, the music still stirs a response?

Is it the feeling you get when someone compliments you on something you have said, something you have done or the way you look?

It may be a simple as a thank you that you receive from someone when you do their shopping for them ...

or draw a person’s attention to the fact that they have dropped some money while they are waiting in queue in front of you?

Whatever it is, take mental notes of these moments rather than dismissing them as pleasant moments. The more you develop this language, the better you are able to know yourself and make decisions that are in harmony with your deepest self.